Ok, ok. It's done now.
They're done.
It's over.
I can stop being broken!
-=-=-
In total, it was only 6 days work.
Three days from a couple of weeks ago, (Wednesday, Thursday, Friday) followed by a Saturday job a week later, and then the Tuesday and Wednesday that we've just had to deal with.
The plasterers have done a fine job.
You can no longer see the big crack where the old door once was.
There's no longer a worrying square patch in the ceiling where we presume somebody fell through and it had to be fixed up.
The ceiling no longer has a large bow in it.
The low brick-built shelf along the chimney wall is gone.
And all the walls are flat as a pancake, ready for decorating.
..
And that can bloody well wait, because even Mum's exhausted from the whole ordeal.
Oh, man, that was rough.
My head somewhat coped with the initial two days together, but when the third day hit, it hit hard.
Saturday was mostly workable, but by the final two days my head was in such a bad space, and even the subtle scraping of plaster was sending swirling echos all through my head.
When a surprise jigsaw suddenly showed up, at the last minute, and started cutting a new piece of skirting board, my head finally went "aargh!!!!!!" and I found myself having to go outside for a little walk up and down the driveway.
Whilst this was ongoing, we also had people out to build a new step at the back door, so there was all the noise of removing the old one, too.
All in all, the whole ordeal left my head spinning wildly, and I honestly haven't been able to focus on anything, this week.
And my head's barely worrying now. I've got so far through not-coping-well that it's pretty much given up on even caring that I'm 3 days late for AGameAWeek and 1 day late for an ALChoon.
I guess I've found that special Zen state of mind.
Om!!!!!
Thanks to the builders, plasterers and other folk who have helped over the past couple of weeks.
And special thanks to Michael Fernie for that lovely card that helped cheer me up in the middle of all this.
[Dave is sitting cross-legged on the ground, surrounded by various rocks arranged in a pattern. Green approaches, looking skeptical.]
Dave: Ah, Greenie! Welcome to my chakra alignment zone!
Green: Dave. You've finally embrased my love of Pet Rocks!
Dave: No, Greenie, they aren't pet rocks. These are special energy-aligning stones!
Green: Right....
Dave: Alignment is important in the world of Zen.
Dave: Do they also help with aligning the wires in your apartment so it doesn't fry the building every time you try to do something?
Dave: Sarcasm has no place in Zen, Greenie. And besides, the power outage was only temporary.
Green: Temporary for eight hours, Dave.
Dave: Minor details! These rocks are different. They're helping me achieve a higher state of zen office repair consciousness.
[Scene Two]
Ext. Dave's garden - Later that afternoon
[Dave is still sitting among the rocks, while Green paces around the arrangement]
Green: Dave, how exactly are these rocks supposed to help with... anything?
Dave: It's all about energy flow, Greenie! Each rock represents a different aspect of zen office repair.
Green: Let me guess, that pointy one is for fixing virtual printers with your mind?
Dave: Of course not. The pointy one is for refilling a stapler. Silly Greenie. The round one is for the printers.
Green: [sighs] And I suppose Mr. Duckello approved this layout?
Dave: Of course! He's my spiritual guide in all things zen and office-related.
Green: I'm surprised you haven't made a pond for Mr. Duckello.
Dave: Matt didn't want me disturbing his landscaping.
Green: That's probably for the best.
[Scene Three]
Ext. Dave's garden - Evening
[Dave is attempting to move a particularly large rock. Green watches, amused]
Green: Need some help there, zen master?
Dave: No, no! I've got this. It's all part of the process.
[Dave strains and the rock barely moves an inch]
Green: You know, if you put this much effort into actual office work, you might not need imaginary zen repairs.
Dave: But Greenie, this is so much more fulfilling! Watch, once I move this rock, I'll have unlocked the secret to fixing any office equipment!
[Dave gives one final push and loses his balance, falling face-first into the rock arrangement]
Green: Well, I suppose that's one way to align your chakras.
Dave: [muffled] I think I've achieved enlightenment, Greenie. Everything is swirling into a meditative state of spinning.
Green: That's probably a concussion, Dave. Come on, let's get you inside before you try to debug the garden gnomes or something.
[As Green helps a dazed Dave to his feet, we see Mr. Duckello perched on one of the rocks, seemingly overseeing the whole scene]
Dave: [still woozy] Mr. Duckello approves, Greenie. We're on the path to true zen office mastery!
Green: No, I think you're on a path to true hospitalisation, Dave.
[End credits roll, as Greenie helps Dave back into the building.]
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