[verse]
What's the big idea? What could it be?
What is it meant to be?
I don't know. (No I don't)
Do you know what it is?

[alt-verse]
What's the tangled web of things?
The coins, the dots, the bits of string?
I don't know. (No I don't)
Do you know what it is?

[bridge]
It's just a curious conundrum,
Something strange that makes we wonder.
What is that supposed to be?
It looks so odd to you and me.

[verse]
What is the thing, it looks so curious.
The way it's drooping, furious.
No matter what it could be though.
I'm sure it would be fun to know,

[alt-verse]
What gameplay could be had inside,
There is no shame, no need to hide.
Let's have a pull, a tug, a snip.
And see what things come out of it.

To play.

JNKCE20250819

Certified
Int. Dave's Games and ScrunchCakes

[Dave is proudly displaying a freshly framed Food Hygiene Rating certificate at the store counter. Greenie is polishing the Centipede machine.]

Dave: Look at that, Greenie! A shiny new certificate! I told you we were professionals!
Green: I'm not entirely sure a rating of "three" is something to brag about, Dave.
Dave: Three, though. Three!
Green: Out of five.
Dave: Yeah, but three. Considering the amount of exploded purple we still had coating much of the kitchen, yesterday, that's not bad.
Green: It’s a wonder we didn't get a zero.
Dave: Don't be so negative! Three is a good number! It's a prime number! It's the number of sides on a triangle! It's... it's almost a four!
Green: It's an average score, Dave.
Dave: It's a Critically Triangular rating!
Green: It means we're okay, but there's still room for improvement.
Dave: Improvement? What could we possibly improve on? The ScrunchCakes are perfect, the games are retro, the Sentinel is only mildly shooting people once a week or so now...
Green: [reads a checklist] Hairnets, less cross-contamination, more general cleanliness.
Dave: [frowning] I’ve got some purple hairnets on order, they'll be here any day now. I think they're supposed to be here, today.
Green: And what about the rest of the suggestions he made.
Dave: I'm not sure. I gave a copy of the list to Brian. He's reorganising the kitchen.
Green: Maybe you should be in there helping, instead of standing here proudly looking at a number three.
Dave: Three though! The important thing is we passed! The Health Inspector gave us a three! We should celebrate!
Green: Celebrate? How?
Dave: With a new ScrunchCake flavour! I'm thinking... a three-cheese triangular ScrunchCake! [air quotes] "Critically Triangular" It sells itself!
Green: Dave, no.
Dave: Dave, yes! For brand synergy!
Green: Just... put the certificate on the wall, Dave. Before you come up with any more disastrous ideas.

[End Credits Roll as Dave proudly hangs the certificate on the wall, next to the high score spreadsheet.]